Background: Ever since I had my kids I am afraid of leaving them early before they reach adulthood. I think that is normal with any mother. We want to be here to take care of our kids.

I am 41. They are 3 and 7. A couple nights ago I had a dream that either my youngest, or another child but not my oldest was sitting on my chest giggling and we were playing. I was in a good mood. I remember thinking; "I am 42 (even though I am 41 right now). I don’t want to leave when I am 52." I wasn't sad when I thought it. It was just matter of fact. Then I woke up. What the . . . ! I was upset when I woke up and didn't feel any of the happiness I felt in my dream.

My husband and I have been tossing the idea around about having another one. I would be 42 when born (yeah some may think that's too old. That's another forum). So I understand this unknown child was my wishful thinking child. I grapple with how old will I be down the road.

Either way, I am worried I am going to leave them at 52 based on my dream. I am trying to tell myself that it’s more of an anxiety dream because I have worried about not being here for them. I mean I don't have time to worry for 11 years about leaving at 52. That completely sucks!!!! I need to get a handle on that or I'll turn into a nutjob (or more so ; )

Also, I always play with my calculator figuring out how old I will be when they are a certain age and hope I will still be here. I have real bad anxiety issues. I have had dreams come true, but also have dreams that don't come true. So I never know what is what.

I am hoping this dream is my anxiety manifesting rather than me foreshadowing. I mean it wasn't an outide voice saying You will die at 52! Iwas just my internal thought in my dream sayiny simply: I don't want to leave at 52. Why 52? That is the part that scares me because it was so detailed.

Thank you in advance.

Aulora,

..

Do you have any reason to think that it is likely that you will die at 52, which is very young? Do you have family members that died young, or do you have health problems?

Often, dying in a dream is really about change, so the dream could be about a change that is going to happen in your life - that could have to do with having a child, menopause, or anything else.

The number 52 makes me think of a deck of cards, which reminds me of fate as well as choices.

Can you think of anything else that number might mean to you?

If you are worried about leaving your children early, then the best things you can do are take care of any medical problems, exercise, get enough rest and eat a healthy diet.

I am in good health and do not have any reason to think along those lines. Family members are in good health as well. Both of my parents are still living. They are 72. It just seems like women now a days are having health problems in their 50's. I think I just fear getting older and want to be here for my kids. I am oddly detailed sometimes and I guess my brain just chose that number. All I can do is work on being healthy and try to stress less. Thank you for your reply : )