Hello! Rose again. This time I have a dream. I am in this room, but its not really a room its just white, there are no walls or ceiling or floor just white. I am with my significant other, I am not pregnant. (I am one week from delivering in reality) he turns to me and asks, "Do you want her to have long legs or short legs?" Holding up two wooden table legs as if he is going to screw them into her hips. (our childs hips) I shrug and say, "Whatever works." in the back of my mind I am slightly aware that some thing is wrong with this picture but I am not sure what it is. I look down and I am holding in my hand an owners manual, but I can't read it, I don't know how to read, the pictures confuse me and the words are blurred. I become overwelmed not really because I can't read this thing, but because of the confussion. I let myself conlapse on the floor, and I am suddenly on the floor in the living room of my childhood home but I am an adult and now I am pregnant. but my little brother is there as a 8 year old, (he's now eighteen) he's adorable, he puts his head on my belly with a big smile because he knows there is a baby in there. I begin to cry and hug him. Thats when Josh my other half comes out of the kitchen and tells me that we have to go.-- then I woke up-- Before you attempt an interpretation, I want you to know that I have no fears of what a good mother I will be, I have plenty of experience, my mother does her part to over populate the world. I can partially understand crying when I see my baby brother, he is now grown and I sometimes think that I could have and should have done more to help protect him from the ugly things in this world (he has changed so much) and show him affection, I should have been more motherly or big sisterly. Anyway any input would be received with gratitude.
Okay, even if you think you're sure you are going to be a good mother, and you probably are, there's still going to be a certain amount of anxiety - whether you want to admit it to yourself or not. Things are going to change and it is a big deal, we are still creatures that fear new things no matter how confident we feel; maybe fear isn't the right word for this... it's like when you are going to do something that most people think of as frightening, even if you aren't frightened you might think about being frightened, then dismiss it and carry on. I don't think your unconscious is telling you to be frightened, just running through some ideas in your sleep and wishing it knew all the answers for what is about to come, i.e. wishing there was an instruction manual. I know it seems really obvious and clichéd, but dreams and the unconscious mind are like that sometimes - especially when you are doing one of the big life things; having a baby; getting married; exams at school and so on - they're the kind of dreams that make perfect sense after the fact. Does that help in any way?